Frustrating week leads to outlining basic rules of etiquette

It was a thoroughly exasperating week; between the weather and an inconsiderate public with zero follow-through, my patience was tested to the max. So you reap the benefits with a list of what should be common-sense rules of etiquette when dealing with wildlife rehabbers.

Before diving into the list, however, let’s get the true update out of the way: no new intakes, and a week of rain prevented release of the red tail in the flight pen, so the red tail in the house is still awaiting his flight time…no rain is currently predicted after Tuesday of this week, so…fingers crossed….
​
Now, to some basic, common-sense-if-your-mama-raised-you-right rules of etiquette when dealing with wildlife rehabbers:

1. ONE CALL is sufficient. If you leave a message and the rehabber returns your call and sets up a time for you to bring the bird, leave it at that unless something changes—the bird dies or your schedule changes, etc. DO NOT blow up the rehabber’s phone with calls and texts every couple of hours with cryptic “Call me” messages.  
2. If you set up a time to bring the bird that day, the next day or in a couple of days, HAVE THE COURTESY TO NOTIFY THE REHABBER if there’s a change in status. It’s not our place to ride your arse to get the bird; YOU called US. Believe it or not, we do have other things going on in our lives: other wildlife to care for, jobs to keep our lights on, family matters to deal with, etc.
3. DO NOT bypass the rehabber’s voicemail message with an immediate hang-up and text. There is important information in the voicemail message. When you do an “end-run” around the voicemail message, you miss vital information and irritate the rehabber.
4. Text ONLY when the rehabber hasn’t responded to the voicemail you left within thirty minutes to an hour. We don’t have time to text back and forth with you for half an hour when a five-minute phone call could have addressed the issue.
5. In voicemail messages, leave your location as well as your phone number.  Feel free to send a CLEAR photo of the bird via text but mention in the voicemail message that you’re doing so; that way we know where that random bird pic came from.
6. If you insist on texting first, send a CLEAR photo of the bird to begin with—saves time. Also, see #5 above—include location and phone number.
7. IT IS YOUR RESPONSIBILITY TO GET THE BIRD TO THE REHABBER. We are NOT employees of DNR or FWS. This means we actually have paying jobs in addition to our VOLUNTEER work as rehabbers. Whether we work outside the home or freelance from home, we CANNOT drop what we’re doing and ignore deadlines and the wildlife currently in our care to drive up to 150 miles round-trip multiple times a day to pick up more wildlife. And if you live less than 50 miles from a rehabber and balk at driving  the wildlife to the rehabber, SHAME ON YOU.
8. Just because we’re home-based—and most rehabbers are—doesn’t mean we don’t eat or sleep at some point during the day/night. If you call during normal meal times—which 90% of people seem to do—there’s a good chance we’re at least wolfing down a pack of crackers at that point and would prefer not to try to talk to you while chewing our food. WE WILL CALL YOU BACK. Give us time. Similarly, if you call after 8pm and we say wait till the morning to bring us the wildlife you found, PLEASE DO NOT INSIST ON BRINGING IT THAT NIGHT.  We do need time to bathe and sleep, and even continue working on our paying jobs in many cases. Hard as it may be to believe, we’re more effective as rehabbers when we have a few hours’ rest a night.
9. LEARN THE GENERAL GEOGRAPHY OF YOUR STATE. If the rehabber you’re about to call is a day-trip away, be sure you’re willing to drive three or more hours one way to get the bird to them. If not, seek help closer to home. There IS a public list of licensed rehabbers available in every state. Most game and fish agencies have that list on their website; many rehabbers also post the list on their websites. Please DO NOT call a rehabber 150 miles away and then tell them it’s too far to drive and ask them to spend 15 minutes trying to locate a rehabber near you—the lists are out there and easily accessible.
10. DON’T EVEN call/email a rehabber in another state and ask for advice on caring for wildlife illegally. The rehab community is fairly small and we tend to at least know each others’ names if we’re not personally acquainted. And we talk to each other. So we KNOW when you’re lying about there not being a rehabber near you. Chances are, we know the rehabber who lives less than 10 miles from you that has already told you to bring them the bird.  And we tend to get a bit pissy when we’re blatantly lied to.
11. (Yeah, I know—even God only had ten commandments.) Please understand that as a rule, rehabbers are NOT “people” people. We don’t like people too much; we deal with them only because we have to in order to help the wildlife. So if, when you bring us a bird or other wildlife, we ignore you while examining and actually talking in dulcet tones to the wildlife, it’s not personal. We just prefer the wildlife to you.